Life with 3 children

I am asked from time to time how life with 3 kids is. The simple answer to this is: busy. Throughout our time as parents, The Wife and I have had to adjust our ways. When we just had Mary Ruth, we were able to double team her and, from time to time, one of us would guard her while the other rested. I wouldn’t say this was “easy”, but we were able to help each other most of the time. It is my opinion that a parent to child ratio of 2:1 gives the parents the best chance of survival.

Anyway, Susie came along and we had to adjust our defense slightly. With two children we found ourselves running a more straight-up man-to-man defense. Every now and then (if we really needed to) we’d leave one child open to double team the other. The key here (and really for all of the defenses) is communication. You’ve got to keep talking and you have to be ready to switch from guarding one child to guarding the other. We were able to get a feel for our opponents… uh… children, and base our match-ups on our strengths. There was enough of a space between Mary Ruth and Susie that my primary responsibility was guarding Mary Ruth while The Wife was matched-up with Susie. But there were times when it just wasn’t my night and Mary Ruth would just be killing me. That’s when we’d switch off and The Wife would guard MR and I’d take Susie. The same thing would happen on nights when Susie was beating The Wife. Surviving two children is all about talking and being willing to adjust your defense. Heck, some nights we’d switch off just long enough for the person with the “off night” to catch their breath and then we’d switch back. Nights when one of us was away got a little harder since the person left at home would be out numbered… but MR was old enough that we could use the TV to our advantage (think of the TV as being the home crowd at a basketball game).

Now with Daniel we have three. Not only do we have three… but with Susie being 18 months old, she has become the “wildcard” of the Kid Team. Of course, with a new parent to child ratio of 2:3, we definitely can’t play man-to-man anymore (and still guard everyone). We are still adjusting to this new defensive strategy. Right now, I’d say we are playing more of an amoeba defense like UNLV used in the early 1990’s during that two year stretch when they were incredible. It’s kind of an attack zone. We’re trying to be pro-active and cut off problems before they happen. We also play a good bit of Box-And-1 with Jennifer guarding Daniel, leaving me to guard the girls. Then there are times when one of us is gone. I don’t know how it is when I’m gone and The Wife has all three… but I can tell you how it is when she’s gone. When I am home alone with all three, it’s like I’m the lone defender back for a 3 on 1 fast break. In these cases I just do the best I can and wait for help. Mary Ruth is old enough to help us with Susie, but not old enough for us to count on her to always help. Susie is old enough to get away and go off on her own… but not old enough for us to want her to go off on her own. Both girls also want to help with Daniel which can be bad since neither is really “qualified” to help with a baby (hell, I’m still not 100% sure I’m qualified to help with a baby). Communication is still big in this kind of situation because there is often at least one child “open” now and it’s important for us to keep rotating to make sure no child is left unguarded for too long. So there is never any real “resting” going on… at least not for an extended amount of time. Still, I guess we are doing something right since we still have all three.

I think it’s a little harder having all 3 be so close in age… but I don’t really have any experience to compare it to. Who knows, maybe it’s easier. My parents had 3 children (still do, in fact)… but we were spread out (well, I was spread out… the other two were/are close in age). When I was born, Sonny was 8 (he would turn 9 in April) and No Name Teri was 6 (she would turn 7 in May). I know what you’re thinking so before you ask, let me just say: Yes, they were a mistake. But we love them just the same. Anyway, things were different for me growing up than they were for them. For one thing, I got yelled at more. It’s not that I was bad or anything… it’s just that I was the “last” child and by God, Dad wasn’t going to let 3 kids get by without yelling at at least one of them. Sonny never talked, so Dad couldn’t yell at him… and No Name Teri wanted their stuff so bad that Dad was probably scared that if he yelled at her she would “off” them (as the kids have said at some point… not sure if they still say that) so she could have everything. So that just left me to be yelled at. On the flip side, I also had a little more freedom to go out and do what I wanted (though, looking back, I wonder if in fact I did not have more freedom and this misunderstanding on my part is what lead to me being yelled at more. An interesting thought, to be sure, but I think I’m right in that I had more freedom). Why did I have more freedom? Because no matter what stage of my life I was in at the time, my parents had already successfully raised two children past that stage… so they didn’t really have anything to prove to anyone. So what if something happened to poor ol’ Greggy... 2 out of 3 isn’t that bad of a percentage. Heck, in those pre-Facebook days, they probably had friends who they had lost touch with who thought they only had two kids anyway. Shoot, if something were to happen to me, they might even get to retire a little earlier. So I’m pretty sure raising three children the way my parents did (i.e., raise perfect silent Sonny and sweet No Name Teri… wait… and then take out all of their frustrations on me while also letting me roam free) was somewhat easier than how we are raising our three (i.e., all at the same time). (Disclaimer: Parts [up to and possibly including all of the parts] of my summation of how my parents raised their children may or may not be true. It is up to the reader to look at the facts as they know them and decide for themselves what, if any, of what they just read is, indeed, true [either partially or wholly… though I must point out that even I don’t believe all of it and I’m the one that wrote it]. Neither I’m just sayin… nor it’s author can be held responsible for anything that was said that might anger The Parents or No Name Teri because as the author was writing he was picturing Sonny laughing and it was this picturing of Sonny laughing that kept egging the author on to write more and more… so naturally, all anger should be directed at Sonny. He should know better. End of Disclaimer).

Know Your Medal of Honor Recipients:

Captain Thomas J. Box (US Army) received his Medal of Honor for his actions on May 14, 1864 at Resaca, Georgia. His citation reads:

Capture of flag of the 38th Alabama Infantry (C.S.A.).

Second Lieutenant George W. G. Boyce, Jr. (US Army) received his Medal of Honor for his actions on July 23, 1944 near Afua, New Guinea. His citation reads:

For conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity at risk of his life above and beyond the call of duty near Afua, New Guinea, on 23 July 1944. 2d Lt. Boyce's troop, having been ordered to the relief of another unit surrounded by superior enemy forces, moved out, and upon gaining contact with the enemy, the two leading platoons deployed and built up a firing line. 2d Lt. Boyce was ordered to attack with his platoon and make the main effort on the right of the troop. He launched his attack but after a short advance encountered such intense rifle, machinegun, and mortar fire that the forward movement of his platoon was temporarily halted. A shallow depression offered a route of advance and he worked his squad up this avenue of approach in order to close with the enemy. He was promptly met by a volley of hand grenades, 1 falling between himself and the men immediately following. Realizing at once that the explosion would kill or wound several of his men, he promptly threw himself upon the grenade and smothered the blast with his own body. By thus deliberately sacrificing his life to save those of his men, this officer exemplified the highest traditions of the U.S. Armed Forces.

Private Erwin Jay Boydston (US Marine Corps) received his Medal of Honor for his actions from July 21 – August 17, 1900 at Peking, China. His citation reads:

In the presence of the enemy at Peking, China, 21 July to 17 August 1900. Under a heavy fire from the enemy during this period, Boydston assisted in the erection of barricades.