Christmas Eve 2009

With today being Christmas Eve, I thought I’d share one of the most famous Christmas poems (‘Twas The Night Before Christmas). But then I figured everyone already knows that poem. So, instead of reposting that poem, I’ll post the legal version I found somewhere on the internet.

Twas the Night Before Christmas (Legal Version)
Author Unknown

Whereas, on or about the night prior to Christmas, there did occur at a certain improved piece of real property (hereinafter "the House") a general lack of stirring by all creatures therein, including, but not limited to a mouse.

A variety of foot apparel, e.g. stocking, socks, etc., had been affixed by and around the chimney in said House in the hope and/or belief that St. Nick a/k/a/ St. Nicholas a/k/a/ Santa Claus (hereinafter "Claus") would arrive at sometime thereafter.

The minor residents, i.e. the children, of the aforementioned House, were located in their individual beds and were engaged in nocturnal hallucinations, i.e. dreams, wherein vision of confectionery treats, including, but not limited to, candies, nuts and/or sugar plums, did dance, cavort and otherwise appear in said dreams.

Whereupon the party of the first part (sometimes hereinafter referred to as "I"), being the joint-owner in fee simple of the House with the parts of the second part (hereinafter "Mamma"), and said Mamma had retired for a sustained period of sleep. (At such time, the parties were clad in various forms of headgear, e.g. kerchief and cap.)

Suddenly, and without prior notice or warning, there did occur upon the unimproved real property adjacent and appurtent to said House, i.e. the lawn, a certain disruption of unknown nature, cause and/or circumstance. The party of the first part did immediately rush to a window in the House to investigate the cause of such disturbance.

At that time, the party of the first part did observe, with some degree of wonder and/or disbelief, a miniature sleigh (hereinafter the "Vehicle") being pulled and/or drawn very rapidly through the air by approximately eight (8) reindeer. The driver of the Vehicle appeared to be and in fact was, the previously referenced Claus.

Said Claus was providing specific direction, instruction and guidance to the approximately eight (8) reindeer and specifically identified the animal co-conspirators by name: Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donder and Blitzen (hereinafter the "Deer"). (Upon information and belief, it is further asserted that an additional co-conspirator named Rudolph may have been involved.)

The party of the first part witnessed Claus, the Vehicle and the Deer intentionally and willfully trespass upon the roofs of several residences located adjacent to and in the vicinity of the House, and noted that the Vehicle was heavily laden with packages, toys and other items of unknown origin or nature. Suddenly, without prior invitation or permission, either express or
implied, the Vehicle arrived at the House, and Claus entered said House via the chimney.

Said Claus was clad in a red fur suit, which was partially covered with residue from the chimney, and he carried a large sack containing a portion of the aforementioned packages, toys, and other unknown items. He was smoking what appeared to be tobacco in a small pipe in blatant violation of local ordinances and health regulations.

Claus did not speak, but immediately began to fill the stocking of the minor children, which hung adjacent to the chimney, with toys and other small gifts. (Said items did not, however, constitute "gifts" to said minor pursuant to the applicable provisions of the U.S. Tax Code.) Upon completion of such task, Claus touched the side of his nose and flew, rose and/or ascended up the chimney of the House to the roof where the Vehicle and Deer waited and/or served as "lookouts." Claus immediately departed for an unknown destination.

However, prior to the departure of the Vehicle, Deer and Claus from said House, the party of the first part did hear Claus state and/or exclaim: "Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!" Or words to that effect.

And really, what would Christmas be without Christmas Vacation?


Chase Towne update: Nothing new to report.

Cleveland Cavs update: The Cavs won last night 117-104. They play the Lakers (in LA) tomorrow.

Winthrop Eagles update: Nothing new to report.

Wait... is Christmas almost here?

As you may or may not have noticed, I’ve been away for the past few days. So let’s catch up…

Saturday night I went up to Orangeburg for the Rickenbacker Gala. What is the Rickenbacker Gala you ask? Let me tell you. Many years ago (not 100% sure how many) Mr. and Mrs. Rickenbacker died after years of suffering with Alzheimer’s disease. Their children decided they would honor their parents by raising money for Alzheimer’s research. As far as I know, they had never been to my office. The children looked us up (or heard about us somewhere) and decided we would be the group they would support. They decided they would throw a gala every year to raise the money that they would then donate to us. This past Saturday was the 13th Rickenbacker Gala (and the 3rd one that I’ve attended). It is held on the 3rd Saturday in December each year. The family begins planning it in January each year. This is not some small gathering. It’s held in an old theatre in the Orangeburg Mall and while I don’t know how many people were there, I can tell you it was packed. A few years ago, The Wife and I went to it. That night there was a freezing rain… and the place was packed. It would seem this thing is a big deal in Orangeburg. They have a band (not sure if it’s been the same band all 13 years, but it has been the same band since I’ve been going). They are out of Augusta, Georgia. I think their name is Perfect Picture. They sing all kinds of songs. I really enjoyed them. I loved their saxophone player. Not so much for his playing (though that was good) but just for how he was up there. This dude was one cool cat from back in the day. Words can’t really do it justice. You’ll have to ask me about him the next time you see me. Anyway, the Rickenbacker’s typically raise anywhere from $4,000 - $6,000 each year with this gala. It is a great way to not only raise money, but also to raise awareness about Alzheimer’s in the Orangeburg community. Over 5 million people have been diagnosed with this disease and over 80,000 of those people live in South Carolina. The Rickenbacker children (along with a man who I believe is their cousin) organize and run the event while their children (who are around my age) fill in as support staff. I hope that the 3rd generation of this wonderful family will step-up and continue this great event when their time comes.

So that was my Saturday. On Sunday I drove Jeremy up to Rock Hill for a Winthrop basketball game. Of course, I wanted to go to Ashley Ridge Church to hear my dear friend Jenn preach… but it was my turn to drive and I couldn’t let Jeremy down. Winthrop gave a great effort against the Charlotte 49ers, but it was not enough. Here’s a little useless fact for you: This past Sunday, the 49ers played the Eagles in the NFL and in College Basketball.



I know that some of you are not able to view the videos I post on here, so I’ll type what was in that video. It had a letter to the editor of the New York Sun from a little 8 year old girl named Virginia that was written in the late 1890s. One of the paper’s editors, Francis P. Church, answered with what would become one of (if not THE) most famous editorials. Honestly, the response was so great that I can only assume that Mr. Church was either from the South or was at least a Southerner at heart. First, here is the letter to the editor:

DEAR EDITOR: I am 8 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus. Papa says, 'If you see it in THE SUN it's so.' Please tell me the truth; is there a Santa Claus?

VIRGINIA O'HANLON
115 WEST NINETY-FIFTH STREET

Here’s the response from Mr. Church:

VIRGINIA, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except [what] they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little. In this great universe of ours man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect, as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

Yes, VIRGINIA, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus. It would be as dreary as if there were no VIRGINIAS. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The eternal light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies! You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if they did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.

You may tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

No Santa Claus! Thank God! he lives, and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay, ten times ten thousand years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.

Chase Towne update: (from his father) Clinic was short and sweet, like we like it. Chase's counts were really high so they told us we could stop his ANC shot at home. This means his counts will probably be at a low on Christmas day. Sounds like a good reason to stay home and enjoy the day. Chase is still on schedule to start his scans next week. Today marks 8 months in Chase's journey. It has been a long and bumpy road. We are thankful for Chase's progress. We are also humbled and grateful for all of your support and prayers. Each of you has made our journey a little smoother. Thank you! Please pray for Chase's body to be ready to fight the germs on its own. Thank You!

Cleveland Cavs update: The Cavs are 21-8. They play at Sacramento tonight.

Winthrop Eagles update: The Eagles fell to 5-6 on the season with a loss last night at Cincinnati. The next game for the Eagles is Tuesday night (December 29) when they travel to Raleigh, North Carolina to take on the NC State Wolfpack.

Friday night fun...

As all of you know, I’m a big family man. Family is important to me. Some would say I’m a lot like Michael Corleone (except that, while I might make fun of my brother, I won’t have him killed). Some people ask me why I don’t talk about my family on this blog more. There are two simple reasons...

1. The Wife doesn’t like for me to make fun of her.
2. I have trouble talking about The Wife without making fun of her.

Still, I will include in this post a picture of my two sweet girls. It’s funny... people always like to tell me who the girls look like. I think the big one looks like Mary Ruth and the little one looks like Susie. Maybe I just don’t look close enough.





Before I forget... Congrats to CJ Spiller and all of the other Clemson football players who graduated recently. I don’t know how hard it is to play college football and get good enough grades to graduate, but I do know how hard it is to “just” graduate… it ain’t easy. So hats off to them.

I don’t know how many of you have ever listened to the Tony Kornheiser (you can only hear it over the internet from down here) but it is great. I love this guy. We have a lot of things in common. We both hate flying, cruises, and strangers. He has a theory that if two people go on a cruise, only one is coming back. This is funny... except for the fact that The Wife has been trying to get me to go on a cruise with her for as long as I can remember. Interesting...

Chase Towne update: Nothing new to report...

Cleveland Cavs update: The Cavs take on the Bucks tonight.

Winthrop Eagles update: The Eagles take on the Charlotte 49ers on Sunday.

Thursday thinkings.....

I would like to start today by reminding everyone about the super fun stuff going on at ARC this weekend. As you know, this new church comes with the I’m just sayin... stamp of approval. It has held the top spot on the I’m just saying... Top 10 Churches Poll since the day the poll was started. So, this Saturday take your kids out to Ashley Ridge High School from 10am – 1pm to let them see Santa and his better half. Then come back on Sunday night for a 6:30 worship service. Remember, set-up starts at 4:00... so don’t get there too early or they will assume you are there to help and they will put you to work (trust me, found that one out the hard way).

Now, friends, you know that I’m not one to complain... but I did come across an “open letter” that may or may not have been sent to CSU leadership in May of this year. I, like the person who wrote this letter, am a student at CSU. (***Before I continue, let me say to any of you thinking about going back to school to get your masters... DON’T! Make sure you understand me... do NOT go back to school to get your masters. The only reason I’m doing it is because I want to have something that everyone else doesn’t have. So don’t do it... unless you want to go back for something silly like Education or Religion... that’s ok. I’m only talking about going back for a real masters.****) Anyway, after a word from our sponsor, we’ll look at the open letter to CSU.


*********************
Dear CSU Leadership:

How do you freakin’ people sleep at night? While looking at my next four classes that I will be taking at your “university” I noticed the price of the books:

(Course # deleted to protect identity): $176 (New); couldn’t find it used
(Course # deleted to protect identity): $135.35 (New); $101.50 (Used)
(Course # deleted to protect identity): $165 (New); $123.75 (Used)
(Course # deleted to protect identity): $193.35 (New); $145 (Used)

Meanwhile, I have TWO versions of the Bible (yes, THE Holy Bible) that TOGETHER cost me around $15. And they were NEW! That’s right, friends, I have a NIV and King James Version of the Bible (both new) that together cost me a small fraction of what a used textbook costs at your bookstore. So really, how do you freakin’ people sleep at night?! I might expect this at some ultra-liberal “We don’t believe in God” type school, but Charleston Southern? The former Baptist College ? Has a change in name made all of you stupid? Do you really think ANY of the books listed above are worth more than God’s Word? $193.35 for a book that I won’t even look at after December 2009? My goodness! For that much money the book should be autographed, I should get a handwritten thank you note from President Jairy Hunter, and the school should provide me with someone who will read the book to me! You people should be ashamed. The money that I now have to use to by textbooks at these outrageous prices would have gone to help start a new church, but now that is not possible. Sure, it’s a Methodist church that will be lead by a woman… so you’re probably happy to be taking money from it, but that’s not the point. The point is that the price of your textbooks is taking money away from people doing God’s work. While I try not to judge others, let me just say that I hope you sinners get your act together before it’s too late.

While I have your attention, what’s the deal with the mascot? A pirate? Really? YOU’RE A CHRISTIAN UNIVERSITY ! The Charleston Southern Buccaneers… who came up with that brilliant idea? Change your mascot to a dove. It’s not like your athletic teams scare anyone anyway. Or be the Deacons. But come on… can you really judge a student who steals from another student when the school mascot is a pirate? What do you think a pirate does?

God Bless,

(name deleted)
**************
While I don’t know the person who wrote this, I do know how they feel. This past semester I spent over $250 on books only to “sell them back” to the school for $35. Not sure, but I think I got screwed in that deal. We never even used one book. What a waste. Oh well, just one more semester left.............

Chase Towne update: (***Note: These updates come from a blog that Chase’s parents update somewhat regularly. I will use my blog to help spread the word on how he is doing. I trust they will not mind, though if I find they do mind I will stop***) So here is the latest update:
Chase is doing ok. Clinic went smooth today, in and out. Chase will continue to get his ANC shot at least until Tuesday of next week. He will go back to clinic on Tuesday 12/22 to check his blood work again. It is a mixed blessing with the ANC shot. The first part is his body is not yet strong enough to fight germs by itself. But we are thankful we have these shots to help him fight and these shots will help him enjoy some Family Christmas activities this weekend. Thankfully Chase is still on the go and eating well. He gets tired a little more often but goes strong until he is exhausted. Please pray for continued strength for our "miracle baby". Thank you.

Here is a picture of Chase:
Cleveland Cavs update: The Cavs beat the 76ers in their last game to give them a 19-7 record. Their next game is tomorrow night vs the Bucks.

Winthrop Eagles update: The Eagles traveled to USC Upstate to take on the Spartans last night. Winthrop won 62-53 to bring their record to 5-4. Their next game is a home on Sunday against the Charlotte 49ers.

Here we go again....

Well I’m back and better than ever. Last night was the last night of my semester. In perhaps the hardest semester of my graduate career, I was able to pull out a ‘B’ in my ECON class and an ‘A’ in my Finance class. The funny thing is between the two classes, the Finance class was the one I was worried the most about. We started with 24 students in that class… by the end of the semester we were down to 9 students (we few, we happy few, we band of brothers… and sisters). So now I only have one class left until all of you will have to call me Master Greg (or Master G).

(****I interrupt this blog to tell you this: As I’m typing this I’m watching my own little MacGyver marathon. What can I say, I love the show. Anyway, the DVD I have in right now is from the 3rd season. Some guy is in a jet and the bad guys are shooting him down. The cockpit scenes are from MacGyver… the scenes of the jets are straight from Top Gun. Even the scene of Maverick slamming on breaks so the MIG flies by him.*****)

So, Saturday is the first day of the “Bowl season”. This is a time that I admit used to be special to me before so many bowls came along that all you had to do was win 6 games to be “rewarded” with a bowl game. But that’s neither here nor there. The thing I really hate is the BCS. Why? Because it claims to crown a National Champion. Here’s the thing, I’m a fan of a playoff system. Not an “And 1” system, not an 8 team playoff, but a 16 team playoff. It’s something I have been demanding for years now. I’m not the only one who has been calling for this. Some of you have as well. So has this guy (I posted this last week, I think). There are many arguments for the BCS… I will answer some of them here:

1. It’s better than the old system. - This would be a great argument… if I was in favor of the old system. Since I’m not fighting for the old system, this argument isn’t relevant.

2. It will make the season too long… kids will have to miss too many classes. – This argument is so stupid, I’m shocked people don’t laugh when they say it. Really, take a look at college basketball and baseball… those kids take classes too. Oh, and this argument would have been better back before they added an extra regular season game and (for some at least) a conference championship game. That kind of hurts that argument.

3. My favorite argument came from Bill Curry (who guys on ESPN called an “expert”). When asked how the other NCAA football divisions were able to have a playoff system and Division 1-A couldn’t, Curry answered: “The other divisions can split scholarships, Division 1 –A (FBS) can’t do that”. - While Bill Curry might be a nice person, I feel he is a moron.

4. Teams would still complain. – Big difference between a team complaining about not getting an At-Large bid and an undefeated team complaining.

5. The bowls are too good for college football. - So keep them. They will matter just as much as they do now.

6. There is no money in a playoff system. - Yeah, what company (or companies) would want to have their name associated with a college football playoff system? Stupid.

7. It would mean too much travel for fans. - Yeah, fans will travel to Boise freakin’ Idaho for a game that doesn’t mean crap but there’s no way they’d travel for a playoff game that could lead to a National Championship. Right.

8. Every game matters/The regular season is a playoff. – Let’s assume the regular season is a playoff. That would mean that as soon as a team loses a game, none of their remaining games matter. So, the regular season is a playoff… in that case, let’s take a look at this (BCS “Champ” Bold, all undefeated teams listed):

1998 (first year of BCS… I think… at least the first version of it) – We have Co-National Champions: Tennessee and Tulane. I guess the “playoff” this year didn’t end with the two undefeated teams playing each other. Oops.

1999 – Co-National Champions: FSU and Marshall. These two teams didn’t play each other either. Oops again.

2000 – National Champion: Oklahoma. Hey, it worked! Kinda. See, the Sooners still had to play FSU in the “Championship Game” even though FSU already had one loss. Not sure how that “playoff” worked.

2001 – National Champion: Miami. Hey, it worked again! Not really (see previous year… same thing, different team… this time Nebraska was the one loss team with the loss that didn’t really matter).

2002 – National Champion: Ohio State. There’s an old saying about a blind squirrel finding a nut…

2003 – National Champion: None. LSU (with one loss).

2004 – Co-National Champions: USC, Auburn, & Utah. USC ended up beating Oklahoma (who was also undefeated at the time) in the “National Championship Game”.

2005 – National Champion: Texas. Yay, BCS!

2006 – National Champion: Boise State! Except the BCS claims Florida is the National Champ for that year… with a 12-1 record. Guess their one loss didn’t count.

2007 – None. LSU (with 2 losses)

2008 – Co-National Champions: Utah & Florida (Florida had one loss).

2009 – Still up in the air, but at least 2 teams will end up undefeated… possibly three teams. Of course, only two of them are playing in the “National Championship Game”.

Now, here’s the thing… it’s not that I think a team should have to go undefeated to be national champion, but if the regular season is a playoff… well, I do think a team should have to go undefeated in the playoffs to win a national championship.

GO NAVY!

BEAT ARMY! For the 8th straight year, Navy has beaten Army in football. Eight years. That's a long time.

Congrats to Mark Ingram for winning the Heisman. For what it's worth, I would rather have CJ Spiller on my team than Mark Ingram. In fact, I'd take Spiller over any of the Heisman candidates.

Well, I've got a sick big girl and a crying little girl and The Wife wants me to help her... so I will wish you all a good night and I look forward to "talking" to you again after my semester is over on Tuesday.

A year ago today...

I know I said I wouldn't have time to post much until after next Tuesday, but I had to take a break from my studies to bring this up. Friends (and brother) it was a year ago today (December 10) that I put into action what I feel will go down in history as my greatest idea EVER. You see, it was a year ago today that I released the first Greg Horres Top 25 Friends Poll. Like most people with great ideas, I wasn't sure if the public was ready for this. So, I sent the original poll to my dear friends KC, Jenn, and Danny. It didn't take long for word to get out and that's when things started looking up. Not only were people ok with this, they wanted it. They needed it. (I have to admit, there was at least one person who was irate with where she was ranked... all I can say is if I had known her feelings on Bill Cosby at that time she might not have been ranked as high as she was). What started as a one time joke became the talk of Summerville over the next 7 to 8 weeks. I had parents of friends lobbying to get their children higher in the poll. People would call me out of the blue just to see how I was doing and ask if I'd like to hang out. I started receiving gifts. One guy even gave me a sweet deal on my mortgage just to move up in the poll (I mean really... who knew you could get a -2.5% rate on your mortgage?). I had the biggest birthday party since I was 8 years old (and received the most birthday gifts since I was 6 years old). The "Top 25" emails were the meat of my second published book.

(SIDE NOTE***That's right, I have written two books. The first, Kevin, was published in 1995 and the second, Emails for Jenn, was published this past summer. There are only two remaining copies of each book. I have one of each. The other copy of Kevin is with my brother (unless he sold it to buy my sister-in-law an engagement ring). I believe I saw where Emails to Jenn was sold on e-bay this past October to raise money for Ashley Ridge Church... though I haven't been able to confirm this yet. END SIDE NOTE****)

There is a good chance that they will show up again someday when I write a book about me (since it doesn't look like anyone else is going to write it). Anyway, I had a great time writing THE Greg Horres Top 25 Friends Poll emails and, to be honest, I'm glad I had enough friends to fill it.

Now, you and I both know that I would love nothing more than to have this post be all about me... but I want to take a minute to promote a good cause. As you know, I dislike cancer. I was young when Jim Valvano was a coach at NC State. My clearest memories of him are when he was an announcer. I liked him. I read a book about him around 1991 (Personal Fouls by Peter Golenbock) that wasn't very flattering. It made him look pretty bad. While I know books don't always tell 100% of the truth, I have a feeling that this book was more right than wrong. Still, I think the good that Jim Valvano did at the end of his life out shines any of the bad he may have done before. He was not perfect, but I think he is a good example of how God can use people. He died a good many years ago, but his name lives on through the V Foundation. This foundation raises money for cancer research. From what I have been told on ESPN, 100% of donations go to research. That's a lot. My grandfather was a cancer survivor. My dad and uncle are cancer survivors. Lucy (my oldest dog) is a cancer survivor. I'm no doctor, but I think the odds are good that either my brother or me (or both of us) will be a cancer survivor at some point. Cancer is bad. It doesn't care if you're a man or a woman. It doesn't care if you're a yankee, a Southerner, or Puerto Rican. You can be rich or poor, it doesn't care. It doesn't even care if you are old or young. I've got a friend from my days at Ashley River Baptist Church. He has a son (Chase Towne) who is fighting cancer right now. This past April when Chase was 8 months old they found out he had cancer. Since then, they've been going to MUSC for chemo... he's now on round 10. The family has a blog on CarePages.com where they update everyone on how Chase is doing. Every time I read it I am amazed at what this family (Chuck, his wife, daughter, and Chase) has to go through. Most posts bring tears to my eyes. I've never had it myself, but from what I've been told chemo ain't fun at all. The fact that he's now on round 10 is amazing. It makes me think about Jimmy V's words, "Don't give up, don't ever give up".

So.....

As I'm sure all of you have noticed, I have not been posting lately at the rate I usually do. I was busy with the Living Christmas Story two days last week (had two parts... nailed them both) and now I am busy trying to get ready for finals. I have a final on Monday night and a group presentation on Tuesday night. So, I will be busy this week getting ready for both. Therefore, I will not be posting anything to my blog until after next Tuesday (except for this Saturday, I'll probably post something then). I will leave you with this:

http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/football/news?slug=dw-ncaafplayoff120709&prov=yhoo&type=lgns

This points out how great a college playoff system would be for college football.

Mailbag, Part 2

Time to catch up on some mail...

Dear I’m just sayin…,

I’m scared! I’ve had a sweet gig for the past few months. I’ve been getting paid to hang out with friends and only do real work about once a month. But starting next month that’s all going to change…. starting January 17th (the middle of January) I’m going to have to work every Sunday! I don’t know if I can do it!

Worried Preacher

Dear Worried,

Let not your heart be troubled, you believe in God… so remember to trust Him and keep Him first and I’m sure this church thing will work out for you. As for having to work more… I feel your pain. I’ve had more and more work to do lately and (get this) my boss is expecting me to get the work done (in a short amount of time, no less!). Honestly, if I wanted this kind of pressure I’d work in the private sector. But enough about me, this is about you. You’ll be fine. Just remember, it’s all about Jesus… but that doesn’t mean you should forget about money. Money pays the bills. I’ll be more than happy to help you in the fundraising department. Speaking of money, remember the advice my first retail boss gave me: In God we trust, all others we check behind. The point… money is a big temptation, so don’t put people in a situation where they’ll be tempted.

Dear I’m just sayin…,

I was out with some friends two weeks ago playing football when one of them got hurt. It turns out he “suffered” a concussion. Well, we had a big game this past Sunday and my friend didn’t play because he told the doctors he was still hurt. What a wimp! How could he leave us hangin’ like that? I said he needed to man up! I’m right, right?

Pissed in Pittsburgh

Dear Pissed,

You’re wrong on this one, my good friend. Trust me when I tell you that when it comes to the brain, you don’t play around. Let’s face it, chances are good that if your friend had played he would have gotten hit hard. Concussions are one thing you shouldn’t “man up” on. Too many close together can kill you. Even if they don’t kill you, they can kill brain cells. What good are all of your accomplishments if you can’t remember them? In my humble opinion, you should sit out AT LEAST one week after a concussion. And hey, if you really care about your friend… don’t let him do anything stupid. And don’t talk bad about him to the press… you’re better than that.

Dear I’m just sayin…,

Hey, it’s Tiger. I need some advice. My wife is pretty pissed at me right now. And to add insult to injury, my girlfriends aren’t calling me back. Where did I go wrong? I’m not a bad guy. People don’t know what it’s like with my wife. It’s always, “Look at the baby”… well what about me? And all these people judging me, they don’t know what it’s like having tons of hot women throwing themselves at me. That kind of thing doesn’t happen to them! It’s not fair!

Tiger

Dear Tiger,

I will give you two answers:

1. You got married. You said I do. Keep it in your pants. And don’t think I don’t know how it feels. I don’t want to brag, so let’s just say you aren’t the only person who has hot women wanting him. I’ve had this “problem” since high school. But guess what? Since I told The Wife “I do”, I’ve told the other women “I don’t”. Of course now, thanks to you, The Wife is starting to question why I took up golf a couple years ago. Thanks, a-hole.

2. What the hell were you thinking? Calling her with your cell phone? Leaving your name on her voicemail? Dude… you have millions of dollars! Think! Pay someone to go tell her. And what the hell is her number doing in your phone? Are you really that stupid? DELETE! I always clear my phone before I get home. The Wife looks through my phone and guess what she’ll find… nothing! If you’re going to play the game that sloppy, stay on the bench.

Cleveland Cavs update: The Cavs played the Bulls tonight (Friday). Their next game is Sunday night against the Bucks.

Winthrop Eagles update: The Eagles lost a close one at home in overtime to preseason favorite Radford on Thursday. The Eagles will face High Point on Saturday night at home. I won't be there... have to go to something that the Cosby hater put together.

Advent Conspiracy

As many of you know, I have been a fan of the Advent Conspiracy since before it had a name. This is a subject that I enjoy talking about and I’m sure that others in the blogging world will follow my lead on this (I might even influence a follower of mine to talk a little about this in her next monthly sermon). *******Oh, before I forget… Today is the first day of December which means Sunday is the first Sunday of the month! Time to meet at the ARC! I’m sure the music will be great.******* Anyway, before I talk about the A.C. (as some of us call it… or maybe I’m the only one who calls it that, I don’t know) I wanted to talk about how things have changed for me over time. When I was a little lad growing up on James Island, things were simple. Santa would give me gifts, my parents would give me gifts, and my brother and sister would give me gifts. I, in turn, would give gifts to my parents and brother and sister (paid for by my parents) and Santa would get cookies. Life, as they say, was good.

Then the family started to grow. My generation got married and had children. My parents stopped paying for the gifts that I gave to others. The cost of Christmas shot up big time (The Wife don’t like cheap gifts). Then the people in charge started changing things. We started drawing names with my Mom’s side of the family to help us decide who we’d exchange gifts with. The only reason I was ok with this is that I was able to fix it so that I was always exchanging gifts with my cousin Louis (that’s right, I fixed the name drawing… don’t judge me). I fought against other ideas, like everyone buying a gift card and then we each draw one out of a hat. I came up with what I still think is a brilliant idea: Everyone buy for the same person (and we rotate who that person is every year). For example, the first year everyone would buy a gift for me. The next year everyone would buy a gift for my brother and so on and so on. This, however, was too perfect to catch on (my brother was the only one I could sell the idea to). I’ve also seen at work (and other places) the idea of everyone buying stupid gifts and then people picking the one they want and someone else “steals” it from them and around and around it goes. Things got to the point with my family that I finally said listen, let’s just all buy for the kids (because you know I love the kids) and not worry about buying for each other. Let our presence be our present to each other. So that’s what we do now.

But what about this whole Advent Conspiracy thing? The concept is simple and can be broken down into four parts: Worship Fully, Spend Less, Give More, and Love All. In other words: Remember what Christmas is all about. You can still give gifts… but don’t give just for the sake of giving something. Don’t go into debt over meaningless stuff that will be forgotten by the end of January (if not before then). Don’t buy a gift because you “have” to. Memories come more from being with each other… not buying stuff for each other. Think about that.