Disclaimer

If you do not know me (I mean, really know me) then there is something you need to understand before you read this blog: I value the truth above everything else... except a good laugh. A good laugh will almost always beat the truth as far as I’m concerned. Everything you read on this blog will be true, somewhat true, or something I made up in an effort to get a laugh. Sometimes I will go on a rant that I don’t really mean (or only kind of mean). Sometimes I will mean what I write only to completely change my mind a year, month, or day later. Such is life. By reading this blog you agree not to get offended by anything I write (or, at the very least, you agree not to tell me or anyone else that you are offended). It is worth noting that my employer does not endorse my blog (or even read it, to tell you the truth). The Wife also does not endorse my blog (though she will read it from time to time). I am not paid to write this... it’s just my way of giving back to the community. I have, and will, touch on a wide range of subjects and will give my opinion on these subjects. Again, most of what I say is for laughs but every now and then I will say what I really think and feel (see my views on Westboro Baptist Cult). How will you know when I’m serious and when I’m trying to get a laugh? You’ll know. And if you don’t know, well... maybe this isn’t the best thing for you to be reading. So, sit back, read and enjoy. Leave comments if you want and don’t be afraid to publicly follow me.



Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Picture Time…

Know Your Medal of Honor Recipients:

Quartermaster Christopher Fowler (US Navy) received his Medal of Honor for his actions on May 11, 1874, on board the USS Fortune. His citation reads:

Served on board the U.S.S. Fortune off Point Zapotitlan, Mexico, 11 May 1874. On the occasion of the capsizing of one of the boats of the Fortune and the drowning of a portion of the boat's crew, Fowler displayed gallant conduct.

Second Lieutenant Thomas W. Fowler (US Army) received his Medal of Honor for his actions on May 23, 1944, near Carano, Italy. His citation reads:

For conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity at risk of life above and beyond the call of duty, on 23 May 1944, in the vicinity of Carano, Italy. In the midst of a full-scale armored-infantry attack, 2d Lt. Fowler, while on foot, came upon 2 completely disorganized infantry platoons held up in their advance by an enemy minefield. Although a tank officer, he immediately reorganized the infantry. He then made a personal reconnaissance through the minefield, clearing a path as he went, by lifting the antipersonnel mines out of the ground with his hands. After he had gone through the 75-yard belt of deadly explosives, he returned to the infantry and led them through the minefield, a squad at a time. As they deployed, 2d Lt. Fowler, despite small arms fire and the constant danger of antipersonnel mines, made a reconnaissance into enemy territory in search of a route to continue the advance. He then returned through the minefield and, on foot, he led the tanks through the mines into a position from which they could best support the infantry. Acting as scout 300 yards in front of the infantry, he led the 2 platoons forward until he had gained his objective, where he came upon several dug-in enemy infantrymen. Having taken them by surprise, 2d Lt. Fowler dragged them out of their foxholes and sent them to the rear; twice, when they resisted, he threw hand grenades into their dugouts. Realizing that a dangerous gap existed between his company and the unit to his right, 2d Lt. Fowler decided to continue his advance until the gap was filled. He reconnoitered to his front, brought the infantry into position where they dug in and, under heavy mortar and small arms fire, brought his tanks forward. A few minutes later, the enemy began an armored counterattack. Several Mark Vl tanks fired their cannons directly on 2d Lt. Fowler's position. One of his tanks was set afire. With utter disregard for his own life, with shells bursting near him, he ran directly into the enemy tank fire to reach the burning vehicle. For a half-hour, under intense strafing from the advancing tanks, although all other elements had withdrawn, he remained in his forward position, attempting to save the lives of the wounded tank crew. Only when the enemy tanks had almost overrun him, did he withdraw a short distance where he personally rendered first aid to 9 wounded infantrymen in the midst of the relentless incoming fire. 2d Lt. Fowler's courage, his ability to estimate the situation and to recognize his full responsibility as an officer in the Army of the United States, exemplify the high traditions of the military service for which he later gave his life.

Sergeant Henry Fox (US Army) received his Medal of Honor for his actions on December 23, 1862, near Jackson, Tennessee. His citation reads:

When his command was surrounded by a greatly superior force, voluntarily left the shelter of the breastworks, crossed an open railway trestle under a concentrated fire from the enemy, made his way out and secured reinforcements for the relief of his command.


We went to the zoo yesterday. I think I got some pretty good pictures but I haven’t had time to upload them… maybe I’ll post them next week.


The I’m just sayin… Top 2,613 Movies of All-Time Countdown

75 Ben-Hur
William Wyler
Charlton Heston, Stephen Boyd, Jack Hawkins
1959

74 Forrest Gump
Robert Zemeckis
Tom Hanks, Robin Wright Penn, Gary Sinise, Sally Field, Mykelti Williamson, Haley Joel Osment
1994
Forrest Gump: "My momma always said, 'Life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get'".

Forrest Gump: "Stupid is as stupid does".

73 Guarding Tess
Hugh Wilson
Shirley MacLaine, Nicolas Cage, Austin Pendleton
1994

72 The King's Speech
Tom Hooper
Colin Firth, Geoffrey Rush, Helena Bonham Carter
2010

71 The Ten Commandments
Cecil B. DeMille
Charlton Heston, Yul Brynner, Edward G. Robinson, Anne Baxter, Yvonne De Carlo, Debra Paget, John Derek
1956

70 Young Guns II
Geoff Murphy
Emilio Estevez, Kiefer Sutherland, Lou Diamond Phillips, Christian Slater, William Petersen
1990
William H. Bonney: "Yoohoo. I'll make you famous!"

Josiah Gordon "Doc" Scurlock: "You son of a bitch! You're starting to believe what they're writing about you, aren't you? Let me tell you what you really are! You rode a 15 year old boy straight to his grave, and the rest of us straight to hell... straight to hell! William H. Bonney! You are *not* a god!"
[cocks his gun and points it at Billy]
William H. Bonney: "Why don't you pull the trigger and find out?"
***Note from Greg: BOOM! I love that quote! Everytime I hear it I can't help but yell "WOW!" That's what I'm talking about...

Josiah Gordon "Doc" Scurlock: "Billy! Let's finish the game".

69 Couples Retreat
Peter Billingsley
Vince Vaughn, Jon Favreau, Jason Bateman, Faizon Love, Kristen Davis, Malin Åkerman, Kristen Bell, Kali Hawk, Jean Reno
2009
Dave: "Is his junk literally out of his pants?"
Ronnie: "Yes".
Dave: "Now it's a party".

Dave: "You got a pose called yoga guy gets his ass kicked? Cause that's my favorite one".

68 Airplane!
Jim Abrahams, Jerry Zucker
Robert Hays, Julie Hagerty, Leslie Nielsen, Peter Graves, Robert Stack, Lloyd Bridges, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
1980
Ted Striker: "My orders came through. My squadron ships out tomorrow. We're bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours. We're coming in from the north, below their radar".
Elaine Dickinson: "When will you be back?"
Ted Striker: "I can't tell you that. It's classified".

Rumack: "You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital".
Elaine Dickinson: "A hospital? What is it?"
Rumack: "It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now".

Rumack: "Can you fly this plane, and land it?"
Ted Striker: "Surely you can't be serious".
Rumack: "I am serious... and don't call me Shirley".

Rumack: "Well, I don't have anything to say, you've done the best you could. You really have, the best you could. You can't expect to win em all. But, I want to tell you something I've kept to myself through these years. I was in the war myself, medical corps. I was on late duty one night when they brought in a badly wounded pilot from one of the raids. He could barely talk. He looked at me and said, 'The odds were against us up there, but we went in anyway, I'm glad the Captain made the right decision.' The pilot's name was George Zip".
Ted Striker: "George Zip said that?"
Rumack: "The last thing he said to me, 'Doc,' he said, 'some time when the crew is up against it, and the breaks are beating the boys, tell them to get out there and give it all they got and win just one for the Zipper. I don't know where I'll be then, Doc,' he said, 'but I won't smell too good, that's for sure'".
Ted Striker: "Excuse me doc, I got a plane to land".

Captain Oveur: "You ever been in a cockpit before?"
Joey: "No sir, I've never been up in a plane before".
Captain Oveur: "You ever seen a grown man naked?"

Joey: "Wait a minute. I know you. You're Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. You play basketball for the Los Angeles Lakers".
Roger Murdock: "I'm sorry son, but you must have me confused with someone else. My name is Roger Murdock. I'm the co-pilot".
Joey: "You are Kareem! I've seen you play. My dad's got season tickets".
Roger Murdock: "I think you should go back to your seat now Joey. Right Clarence?"
Captain Oveur: "Nahhhhhh, he's not bothering anyone, let him stay here".
Roger Murdock: "But just remember, my name is..."
[showing his nametag]
Roger Murdock: "ROGER MURDOCK. I'm an airline pilot".
Joey: "I think you're the greatest, but my dad says you don't work hard enough on defense".
[Kareem's getting mad]
Joey: "And he says that lots of times, you don't even run down court. And that you don't really try... except during the playoffs".
Roger Murdock: [breaking character] "The hell I don't! LISTEN KID! I've been hearing that crap ever since I was at UCLA. I'm out there busting my buns every night. Tell your old man to drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes".

67 Friday the 13th
Sean S. Cunningham
Betsy Palmer, Adrienne King, Kevin Bacon
1980

66 Two Mules for Sister Sara
Don Siegel
Clint Eastwood, Shirley MacLaine
1970
[toasting Sister Sara]
Gen. LeClair: "To your virtues... and especially your vices, Sara".

Sara: "If money is all you care about then why did you fight in that war?"
Hogan: "Everybody's got a right to be a sucker once".

65 Apocalypse Now
Francis Ford Coppola
Martin Sheen, Marlon Brando, Robert Duvall, Frederic Forrest, Sam Bottoms, Laurence Fishburne, Dennis Hopper
1979
Kilgore: "I love the smell of napalm in the morning".

64 Patton
Franklin J. Schaffner
George C. Scott, Karl Malden
1970
Patton: "Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country".

63 Raiders of the Lost Ark
Steven Spielberg
Harrison Ford, Karen Allen, Denholm Elliott, Paul Freeman, John Rhys-Davies, Ronald Lacey, Alfred Molina
1981
Indiana: "I hate snakes, Jock! I hate 'em!"

62 Road House
Rowdy Herrington
Patrick Swayze, Kelly Lynch, Sam Elliott, Ben Gazzara
1989
Dalton: "Pain don't hurt".

Dalton: "All you have to do is follow three simple rules. One, never underestimate your opponent. Expect the unexpected. Two, take it outside. Never start anything inside the bar unless it's absolutely necessary. And three, be nice".

Dalton: "I want you to be nice until it's time to not be nice".

Doc: "How's a guy like you end up a bouncer?"
Dalton: "Just lucky I guess".

61 Superman
Richard Donner
Marlon Brando, Gene Hackman, Christopher Reeve, Margot Kidder, Jackie Cooper, Ned Beatty, Valerie Perrine, Glenn Ford
1978

60 Wedding Crashers
David Dobkin
Owen Wilson, Vince Vaughn, Christopher Walken, Rachel McAdams, Jane Seymour, Bradley Cooper
2005
Jeremy Grey: "Tattoo on the lower back? Might as well be a bullseye".

Jeremy Grey: "Listen, I'm getting married".
John Beckwith [points at the door]: "Get out".

Chazz Reinhold: "HEY MOM! CAN WE GET SOME MEATLOAF?"

Flip: "Yeah! Crabcakes and Football. That's what Maryland does!"

59 Ocean's Eleven
Steven Soderbergh
George Clooney, Matt Damon, Brad Pitt, Andy García, Julia Roberts, Don Cheadle, Casey Affleck, Elliott Gould, Carl Reiner
2001
Danny: "Ten oughta do it, don't you think?"
Rusty: [Stares of in silence, not looking at Danny]
Danny: "You think we need one more?"
Rusty: [Silence]
Danny: "You think we need one more".
Rusty: [Silence]
Danny: "All right, we'll get one more".
Rusty: [Blinks]

58 Halloween
John Carpenter
Donald Pleasence, Jamie Lee Curtis
1978

57 Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Steven Spielberg
Harrison Ford, Sean Connery, Denholm Elliott, Alison Doody, Julian Glover, John Rhys-Davies, River Phoenix
1989
Professor Henry Jones: "I'm sorry about your head though. But I thought that you were one of them".
Indiana Jones: "Dad, they come in through the doors".
Professor Henry Jones: "Ha, good point".

Professor Henry Jones: "We named the *dog* Indiana".

56 Knute Rockne, All American
Lloyd Bacon
Pat O'Brien, Ronald Reagan
1940
George Gipp: "Win one for the Gipper!"

Knute Rockne: "Now I'm going to tell you something I've kept to myself for years. None of you ever knew George Gipp. He was long before your time, but you all know what a tradition he is at Notre Dame. And the last thing he said to me, 'Rock,' he said, 'sometime when the team is up against it and the breaks are beating the boys, tell them to go out there with all they've got and win just one for the Gipper. I don't know where I'll be then, Rock,' he said, 'but I'll know about it and I'll be happy'".

55 Mr. Holland's Opus
Stephen Herek
Richard Dreyfuss, Glenne Headly, Olympia Dukakis, Jay Thomas
1995
Vice Principal Wolters: "I care about these kids just as much as you do. And if I'm forced to choose between Mozart and reading and writing and long division, I choose long division".
Glenn Holland: "Well, I guess you can cut the arts as much as you want, Gene. Sooner or later, these kids aren't going to have anything to read or write about".

54 Rain Man
Barry Levinson
Dustin Hoffman, Tom Cruise
1988
Raymond: "I'm an excellent driver".

53 Saving Private Ryan
Steven Spielberg
Tom Hanks, Edward Burns, Matt Damon, Tom Sizemore, Dennis Farina, Ted Danson, Paul Giamatti, Bryan Cranston, Harve Presnell, Vin Diesel
1998

52 We Were Soldiers
Randall Wallace
Mel Gibson, Sam Elliott, Madeleine Stowe
2002
Lt. Colonel Hal Moore [after saying a prayer]: "Oh, yes, and one more thing, dear Lord, about our enemies, ignore their heathen prayers and help us blow those little bastards straight to Hell. Amen".

51 The Graduate
Mike Nichols
Dustin Hoffman, Anne Bancroft, Katharine Ross
1967
Benjamin: "Mrs. Robinson, you're trying to seduce me".


Picture Tuesday









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