If you do not know me (I mean, really know me) then there is something you need to understand before you read this blog: I value the truth above everything else... except a good laugh. A good laugh will almost always beat the truth as far as I’m concerned. Everything you read on this blog will be true, somewhat true, or something I made up in an effort to get a laugh. Sometimes I will go on a rant that I don’t really mean (or only kind of mean). Sometimes I will mean what I write only to completely change my mind a year, month, or day later. Such is life. By reading this blog you agree not to get offended by anything I write (or, at the very least, you agree not to tell me or anyone else that you are offended). It is worth noting that my employer does not endorse my blog (or even read it, to tell you the truth). The Wife also does not endorse my blog (though she will read it from time to time). I am not paid to write this... it’s just my way of giving back to the community. I have, and will, touch on a wide range of subjects and will give my opinion on these subjects. Again, most of what I say is for laughs but every now and then I will say what I really think and feel (see my views on Westboro Baptist Cult). How will you know when I’m serious and when I’m trying to get a laugh? You’ll know. And if you don’t know, well... maybe this isn’t the best thing for you to be reading. So, sit back, read and enjoy. Leave comments if you want and don’t be afraid to publicly follow me.

Saturday, May 27, 2017

We've reached the Top 100...

The I’m just sayin… Top 2,982 Movies of All-Time Countdown

100 Miracle on 34th Street
George Seaton
Edmund Gwenn, Maureen O'Hara, John Payne, Natalie Wood
Kris Kringle: "Now wait a minute, Susie. Just because every child can't get his wish that doesn't mean there isn't a Santa Claus".

99 Predator
John McTiernan
Arnold Schwarzenegger, Carl Weathers, Jesse Ventura

98 Guess Who's Coming to Dinner
Stanley Kramer
Spencer Tracy, Katharine Hepburn, Sidney Poitier, Katharine Houghton, Beah Richards

97 Alien
Ridley Scott
Sigourney Weaver, Tom Skerritt, Harry Dean Stanton, Veronica Cartwright, John Hurt, Ian Holm, Yaphet Kotto

96 Beauty and the Beast
Gary Trousdale, Kirk Wise
Robby Benson, Paige O'Hara, Jerry Orbach, Angela Lansbury (voices)

95 Apollo 13
Ron Howard
Tom Hanks, Kevin Bacon, Bill Paxton, Gary Sinise, Ed Harris, Kathleen Quinlan
Jim Lovell: "Houston, we have a problem".

Gene Kranz: "Failure is not an option".

NASA Director: "This could be the worst disaster NASA's ever faced".
Gene Kranz: "With all due respect, sir, I believe this is gonna be our finest hour".

94 Driving Miss Daisy
Bruce Beresford
Morgan Freeman, Jessica Tandy, Dan Aykroyd, Esther Rolle, Patti LuPone

93 Kicking & Screaming
Jesse Dylan
Will Ferrell, Robert Duvall
Phil Weston: "Hey, I almost had you!"
Buck Weston: "What do you call that again, when you almost win? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah... Losing!"

Referee: "Where do I know you from?"
Phil Weston: "I've been your neighbor for the last seven years!"
Referee: "No, that ain't it".
Phil Weston: "That's definitely it!"
Referee: "I'll figure it out".

Buck Weston: "You know how hard it's been for me ever since your mom died".
Phil Weston: "She didn't die! She divorced you!"
Buck Weston: "Ehh... tomatoes, tomahtoes".

92 Robin and the 7 Hoods
Gordon Douglas
Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Sammy Davis, Jr.

91 The A-Team
Joe Carnahan
Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper, Quinton "Rampage" Jackson, Sharlto Copley, Jessica Biel, Patrick Wilson, Brian Bloom
Col. John 'Hannibal' Smith: "I love it when a plan comes together".

90 What a Way to Go!
J. Lee Thompson
Shirley MacLaine, Dean Martin, Paul Newman, Robert Mitchum, Robert Cummings, Dick Van Dyke, Gene Kelly

89 The Terminator
James Cameron
Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton
The Terminator: "I'll be back!"

88 Dr. No
Terence Young
Sean Connery
James Bond: "Bond, James Bond"

87 The Bridge on the River Kwai
David Lean
William Holden, Jack Hawkins, Alec Guinness, Sessue Hayakawa, James Donald, Geoffrey Horne

86 12 Angry Men
William Friedkin
Jack Lemmon, George C. Scott, James Gandolfini, Ossie Davis, William Petersen, Hume Cronyn, Edward James Olmos, Tony Danza, Mykelti Williamson, Armin Mueller-Stahl

85 A Nightmare on Elm Street
Wes Craven
Robert Englund, Heather Langenkamp, Johnny Depp

84 Ben-Hur
William Wyler
Charlton Heston, Stephen Boyd, Jack Hawkins

83 Forrest Gump
Robert Zemeckis
Tom Hanks, Robin Wright Penn, Gary Sinise, Sally Field, Mykelti Williamson, Haley Joel Osment
Forrest Gump: "My momma always said, 'Life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get'".

Forrest Gump: "Stupid is as stupid does".

82 Guarding Tess
Hugh Wilson
Shirley MacLaine, Nicolas Cage, Austin Pendleton

81 The King's Speech
Tom Hooper
Colin Firth, Geoffrey Rush, Helena Bonham Carter

80 The Ten Commandments
Cecil B. DeMille
Charlton Heston, Yul Brynner, Edward G. Robinson, Anne Baxter, Yvonne De Carlo, Debra Paget, John Derek

79 Young Guns II
Geoff Murphy
Emilio Estevez, Kiefer Sutherland, Lou Diamond Phillips, Christian Slater, William Petersen
William H. Bonney: "Yoohoo. I'll make you famous!"

Josiah Gordon "Doc" Scurlock: "You son of a bitch! You're starting to believe what they're writing about you, aren't you? Let me tell you what you really are! You rode a 15 year old boy straight to his grave, and the rest of us straight to hell... straight to hell! William H. Bonney! You are *not* a god!"
[cocks his gun and points it at Billy]
William H. Bonney: "Why don't you pull the trigger and find out?"
***Note from Greg: BOOM! I love that quote! Everytime I hear it I can't help but yell "WOW!" That's what I'm talking about...

Josiah Gordon "Doc" Scurlock: "Billy! Let's finish the game".

78 Couples Retreat
Peter Billingsley
Vince Vaughn, Jon Favreau, Jason Bateman, Faizon Love, Kristen Davis, Malin Åkerman, Kristen Bell, Kali Hawk, Jean Reno
Dave: "Is his junk literally out of his pants?"
Ronnie: "Yes".
Dave: "Now it's a party".

Dave: "You got a pose called yoga guy gets his ass kicked? Cause that's my favorite one".

77 Airplane!
Jim Abrahams, Jerry Zucker
Robert Hays, Julie Hagerty, Leslie Nielsen, Peter Graves, Robert Stack, Lloyd Bridges, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar
Ted Striker: "My orders came through. My squadron ships out tomorrow. We're bombing the storage depots at Daiquiri at 1800 hours. We're coming in from the north, below their radar".
Elaine Dickinson: "When will you be back?"
Ted Striker: "I can't tell you that. It's classified".

Rumack: "You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital".
Elaine Dickinson: "A hospital? What is it?"
Rumack: "It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now".

Rumack: "Can you fly this plane, and land it?"
Ted Striker: "Surely you can't be serious".
Rumack: "I am serious... and don't call me Shirley".

Rumack: "Well, I don't have anything to say, you've done the best you could. You really have, the best you could. You can't expect to win em all. But, I want to tell you something I've kept to myself through these years. I was in the war myself, medical corps. I was on late duty one night when they brought in a badly wounded pilot from one of the raids. He could barely talk. He looked at me and said, 'The odds were against us up there, but we went in anyway, I'm glad the Captain made the right decision.' The pilot's name was George Zip".
Ted Striker: "George Zip said that?"
Rumack: "The last thing he said to me, 'Doc,' he said, 'some time when the crew is up against it, and the breaks are beating the boys, tell them to get out there and give it all they got and win just one for the Zipper. I don't know where I'll be then, Doc,' he said, 'but I won't smell too good, that's for sure'".
Ted Striker: "Excuse me doc, I got a plane to land".

Captain Oveur: "You ever been in a cockpit before?"
Joey: "No sir, I've never been up in a plane before".
Captain Oveur: "You ever seen a grown man naked?"

Joey: "Wait a minute. I know you. You're Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. You play basketball for the Los Angeles Lakers".
Roger Murdock: "I'm sorry son, but you must have me confused with someone else. My name is Roger Murdock. I'm the co-pilot".
Joey: "You are Kareem! I've seen you play. My dad's got season tickets".
Roger Murdock: "I think you should go back to your seat now Joey. Right Clarence?"
Captain Oveur: "Nahhhhhh, he's not bothering anyone, let him stay here".
Roger Murdock: "But just remember, my name is..."
[showing his nametag]
Roger Murdock: "ROGER MURDOCK. I'm an airline pilot".
Joey: "I think you're the greatest, but my dad says you don't work hard enough on defense".
[Kareem's getting mad]
Joey: "And he says that lots of times, you don't even run down court. And that you don't really try... except during the playoffs".
Roger Murdock: [breaking character] "The hell I don't! LISTEN KID! I've been hearing that crap ever since I was at UCLA. I'm out there busting my buns every night. Tell your old man to drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes".

76 Friday the 13th
Sean S. Cunningham
Betsy Palmer, Adrienne King, Kevin Bacon

75 Two Mules for Sister Sara
Don Siegel
Clint Eastwood, Shirley MacLaine
[toasting Sister Sara]
Gen. LeClair: "To your virtues... and especially your vices, Sara".

Sara: "If money is all you care about then why did you fight in that war?"
Hogan: "Everybody's got a right to be a sucker once".

74 Apocalypse Now
Francis Ford Coppola
Martin Sheen, Marlon Brando, Robert Duvall, Frederic Forrest, Sam Bottoms, Laurence Fishburne, Dennis Hopper
Kilgore: "I love the smell of napalm in the morning".

73 Patton
Franklin J. Schaffner
George C. Scott, Karl Malden
Patton: "Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country".

72 Raiders of the Lost Ark
Steven Spielberg
Harrison Ford, Karen Allen, Denholm Elliott, Paul Freeman, John Rhys-Davies, Ronald Lacey, Alfred Molina
Indiana: "I hate snakes, Jock! I hate 'em!"

71 Road House
Rowdy Herrington
Patrick Swayze, Kelly Lynch, Sam Elliott, Ben Gazzara
Dalton: "Pain don't hurt".

Dalton: "All you have to do is follow three simple rules. One, never underestimate your opponent. Expect the unexpected. Two, take it outside. Never start anything inside the bar unless it's absolutely necessary. And three, be nice".

Dalton: "I want you to be nice until it's time to not be nice".

Doc: "How's a guy like you end up a bouncer?"
Dalton: "Just lucky I guess".

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